I know! It’s been a very long time since I’ve added anything new to the chronicles of my Naughty Little Assassins. They were apparently too busy raising kids to bother killing one. 😛 Thankfully the drought is over. Both Vlad and Elvira have added new victims to their hit lists. Let me see if I can remember the details of the first hit that hasn’t been reported…
Late one night, over at the Kassanova-Pesce Happy Haunts Cemetery, several of the young adults were hanging out. This isn’t an unusual occurrence so I hadn’t been paying much attention to who was there. When 4:00 AM rolled along I dropped in and made Dennis Healy my active so he could hang out with the residents for awhile. He began chatting with Noelle Kassanova, who had been building an igloo. Then Elvira came over to chat with Noelle. I don’t really know what happened next, but Noelle was electrocuted right there in the cemetery. She went down in front of Dennis and even her little brother, as I recall. And Elvira laughed. Then she left. She just walked right off the lot and left. All those witness and she didn’t get arrested. It was sad. 😦
Last you heard from Vlad was that he wanted to make an attempt on the life of Rosa Huffman. Having been thwarted in that effort, he didn’t exactly rush out to find another victim. At least I don’t think he did. But there’s a gap in his list between the last one that I was aware of (Matthew Sullivan) and the next one I witnessed — my records showed 27 murders but his was showing 28. What happened, and who it happened to I will probably never be able to figure out. So we’ll move on to victim #29.
Late one evening I was hovering over Happy Haunts again and from map view I could see that Sarah, Vlad, and Kelly were all standing just off the lot. I dropped the camera down to listen in on their conversation. After a short time Vlad went ahead into the graveyard while the ladies continued to talk. Sarah started flirting with Kelly, who didn’t exactly rebuff the advances. Silly me, I forgot that I had moved Sarah over to Moe’s house to help raise Jordan and Kristen. No problem, they all have no jealousy rewards, so (in theory) Vlad should be ok with it, right? Why not? Doesn’t every man wish his wife and his girlfriend would get along?
Well… so maybe not every man is hoping that his girlfriend will kiss his wife… But this is Vlad.
Soon both ladies make their way onto the lot. Kelly heads over to the bar to get a bite to eat. Sarah is sidetracked by the presence of a tent. If I recall correctly, it was Vlad trying to get her to head in that direction. After finishing her snack, Kelly visited with Dennis a bit before heading over to the hot tub. However, Dennis decided to push the boundaries of marital decency and left his bar to do a little flirting with the pretty blonde. It didn’t last long, soon the bar was calling him back to work. Then Vlad came by to talk to his wife. It would seem he wasn’t pleased. Before she could even get a word into the conversation she was dead. Another death in the cemetery. Another murderer who wasn’t brought to justice. That’s right. Vlad left and went home after Grimmy finished last rites.
This came as quite a shock to me. I was definitely not ready to put an end to the story of Kelly Carpenter Schlick, and I certainly wasn’t going to let her killer raise her daughter. So Kelly’s headstone got placed in the flower bed outside Vlad’s kitchen window. Then Moe brought a serving of Ambrosia over to the house. He left it on the kitchen counter. Soon Kelly’s ghost appeared and, since she had been poisoned, she was absolutely famished. She headed straight to the kitchen. Oooh! Ambrosia!!! No ghost in her right mind can turn down a plate of Ambrosia. A few minutes later Kelly was gathering up her daughter and moving out. They wound up at Terrence Charming’s place, where he was living with his former guardian, Shaun Jr. Somehow it seemed like a good idea to put a pretty, young, single mom in a house with two single men who desperately needed a push in the right direction.
After those two deaths, most of the others pale in comparison. Elvira apparently got tired of seeing Brandon Hayes as an old man and set him on fire. When Vlad’s son, Jason, died from injuries sustained during a fight with a member of the local Helsing organization, Elvira saw it as her duty to exact payback. That afternoon the leader of the Helsings, Elena Pope, was killed in front of the bookstore.
During this time one of the most bizarre turns was taken in this story: Elvira asked Vlad to marry her! I think they were already engaged at the time that El killed Elena. A bit of a gruesome engagement gift, if you ask me, but if you’re an assassin marrying an assassin, and his son was killed, what the hey, right? The story of their marriage is a short one. Within days Vlad hated her. Apparently the woohoo was good though. They certainly seemed to make time for that. However when they went to the Spring Festival, and Vlad thought about going over to the kissing booth… Let’s just say that was the beginning of the end. Elvira was not happy. And that whole no jealousy thing of Vlad’s? It wasn’t working. She stopped him dead in his tracks. Literally. Poisoned. Right there in front of everyone in the middle of Central Park. I was totally caught off guard.
I paused the game (photo op!) and then thought of all the things I could do to keep him alive: resurrection the old fashioned way (Moe’s Ambrosia), resurrection the new fashioned way (twallan’s DebugEnabler), reset him before he dies, A DEATH FLOWER FOR GRIMMY! But what if he doesn’t have a death flower in his inventory? Who has a death flower and how can I get into his inventory? Joey! Joey has a death flower! I’ll just quickly make him active and transfer his flower to Vlad. Will that work? Wait! What’s that? There’s a death flower in this inventory panel that I’m looking at. Who’s my active? Dennis! Bless you, Dennis! You don’t mind if I borrow this, do you? With a little help from MasterController that flower disappeared from Dennis’ inventory. But would it be there for Vlad when Grimmy appeared? YES! And Vlad was saved from destruction once again!
Since Vlad’s death didn’t get registered by the game he and Elvira were technically still married. I took it upon myself to grant Vlad a divorce and moved Elvira into her own place. Since both of her boys seemed to hate her and like him, he got to keep the kids (no worries, they’re his kids too). Apparently though that wasn’t enough. She made the mistake of starting an argument with him while they were still in the park. (Ok, he made the first mistake by trying to kiss her.) Things got out of hand and suddenly she was drowning in a pool of melted vampire. Right there on the dance floor. Eeww. But she wouldn’t die! Grimmy had been standing behind her when she went down, yet he managed to disappear. He never came back. She just stayed there. Invisible, yet drawing a crowd. Vlad couldn’t leave without losing credit for the kill, so he kept having problems from too much exposure. It was a mess. I finally saved the game in hopes it would miraculously fix itself when it loaded the next day. It didn’t. The only way out was to reset the lot which sent El home alive and well. But at least she wasn’t back at Vlad’s house. It was an exciting trip to the festival, but neither one of them got to add another name to their hit list.